FREEDOM! WE ALL NEED SOME

Hi All, Sorry being M.I.A. for so long.

I had to take some time away from the blog now that

edits on my debut middle grade novel are in full swing,

slow-going still, but swinging. Plus, a blackout in my area

over a week ago, chores piling up, and tight on money

also contributed, but I’ll try to update at least once a

week until things improve on the homefront.

Today, I’m taking a break from my usual posts to

discuss something else that’s been weighing heavy on my

heart lately-

There’s been a lot of talk among parental circles, educators, and all in between about why are kids and teens either take life too seriously or not enough, more often it’s not enough.

Lots of parents seem to be of the view that kids today are lazy, screen obsessed entitlement freaks who don’t want tot work hard for their futures. 

While there’s truth to that, we also overlook another truth, kids are being pressured to grow up faster at all fronts, and yet we complain when they want to be grown ups fast. Well, we’re creating our own problem on this specific point.

As a both a writer of children’s books, and a education-challenged under 30 “Deadbeat” I know from my own experience that we overlook a lot of issues when we talk about education. 

Instead of ranting, I’ll let picture do my talking for me, but fear not, I’ll have MORE words to say on this topic later.

 

NOTE: I’m in no way parent-bashing here,

I‘m not a parent nor teacher, and for those of

you in education from either the parent and/or

teacher POV who are doing right by our

nation’s youth, understand I say this because

I wish there were more of you.

 

More and More Parents see their kids like this- 

Scott_Wilson,_Mena_Popp,_Keith_Long,_Zac_Carter

2009_ESPN_Zone_Chicago_Ultimate_Couch_Potato_Contestant_-_Steve_Janowski_03

Instead of this-   01_Tristeza

What “Test” is worth feeling like this?

  Distant_tragedies_-_Phillip_mourning_the_sinking_of_his_model_boat,_New_Brighton,_Merseyside,_1959_-_Flickr_-_PhillipC

When did school become “God?”

Lost

Does “Sucking at Math” make me less worthy?

  man-93951_640

Is this future migraine/ulcer GOOD for me?

What parents WANT to see-

Jon_Provost_1964

What they NEED to see –  Crying_child_with_blonde_hair

“Mommy, you work a second job to make money, what am I getting out of pre-k and first grade becoming my “second job?” that I don’t get paid for.”

sad-72216_640

 

 

“Dad, I may not have to walk 100 miles to get to school like you did in the “Once upon a time Olden days” , but that doesn’t mean it’s any easier for me, either.”

 

They’ll NEVER get here- University_Park_MMB_I7_Graduation   312px-MplsMTMstatue   USMC-12062   The_Turtles Group_951 81st_TW_photo Winter-wedding-20120203-001 AT_CALGGETT_MEMORIAL_HOSPITAL-WALTER_SOLON_MOYER_III,_THE_FIRST_BABY_OF_THE_NEW_YEAR,_AND_HIS_MOTHER_-_NARA_-_552638     Father_with_his_first_baby_at_first_sight If they Burnout Here-   School's_OutAdults of the World, I URGE you to hear this. We CAN’T let this-  

 

Recession_2008

 

 

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

 

800px-TYAI_Hard_Work

 

Poor_kids_on_holi_festival

Destroy THIS-      

Family_pet

Flickr_-_eflon_-_Father_and_Son

 

 

Mother_and_Son_(8151579343)

 

Family_Fun

 

FOREVER…

 

 

Kids, Parents, Educators, and all those in-between-

What do you think? Please have the courage and heart

to share in the comments below.

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  • Judy

    I agree and disagree. I am a stay at home mom of 2 boys. In a way my kids miss out on a lot because we have no extra money, but I’m always home and they’re outside playing right now. I think most of the things that go on at school are wrong. It’s all about state rules and preparing for those horrible EOGs. (Oh yeah, and SPORTS) Sadly though, all of the tweny somethings I know are wasting opportunities. They blow off opportunities for free education, and live off of parents that are having a hard enough time getting along as it is. I hope to teach my kids to take the time to enjoy what’s important, (family, fun, time outdoors, reading) without thinking they shouldn’t have any responsibilities.

    • Thanks for sharing, Judy. I’m not saying there aren’t concerns in what you bring up.

      But at the same time, I know too many people in my life who got burned out from academics, and I just wish we valued what can’t be taught more, if schools at large can’t do that, family and friends must, or we create a deeper problem inside kids and adults under 30 than the external challenges in front of them right now.

      I just think there are times we create one problem in our kids in trying to resolve another. We drill into their head the necessities of education, and yet we complain when they want to grow up too fast. Well, they have right to be frustrated, we don’t teach the nuances between those two ideals.

      I know many of my author friends are parents who homeschool their kids for the very concerns you bring up, Judy, but not all kids can be homeschooled, so we need to open the conversation up to the other ways that effect their education.

      I did this post to pose the question that families need to ask each other, and find the answers together, and not let ther actions of a few speak for the rest of us.

      We can’t let the ones who choose to not follow that path blind us to those who STRUGGLE to stay the course, that’s what happened to me, and so many in my family, and I just want us to have more empathy for that.

      I’m not self-reliant as I want to be. But that doesn’t mean I’m sitting around drowning in self-pity.

      Sure, there’s some of that, unless you’re emotionless you can’t avoid some feelings of hearbreak, but I WON’T stay there. I can only speak from my experience on the point of “Those who throw opprotunities away.”

      • Judy

        I’m a stay at home mom for the very reasons that you talk about, but the kids or young adults I’m talking about aren’t the same as you. I totally agree about kids getting burned out. That’s why I limit my kids from too many school related activities. General responsibility builds character and empathy though, and a lot of kids just don’t have that anymore. If you’re writing then you’re working for your future. I only wish that I had started when I was younger so I could provide better for my kids now.

  • You know I’m an at-home mom. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I know not everyone can afford to stay home and raise their children, but I believe if you can, you should. I treasure every moment with my little girl.

    • Thanks for chiming in, Kelly.

      I hope I didn’t get too many parents riled up. I’m not a parent and I don’t judge.

      I certainly don’t downplay the importance of the best teachers in our country today. I could not do that job justice.

      But I know from my own experience growing up, and know others in my family who aren’t as fortunate as our writer friends who are parents and do their best in spite of mistakes that get made at times, either by them or the schools their kids attend, there’s more to this issue than the media refuses to acknowledge exists.

      They highlight the lazy kids who are entitlted or don’t want it enough, and I’m not saying they don’t exist, but they don’t represent ALL KIDS, TEENS, and ADULTS UNDER 30 with no kids, aren’t married, who STRUGGLE with their self-worth, just because they lack a dang piece of paper.

      I was really aiming this post for the parents who can’t homeschool their children, they need the same validation that academic achievement is in their reach, and don’t have teachers or parental figures like Judy to look to for guidance and emotional support.

      I believe ALL KIDS AND TEENS deserve to know that the world of academia isn’t the only world that’s worth being part of, and that if you’re struggling there, it doesn’t mean you’re not smart. It doesn’t mean you’re not working hard.

      We don’t just have a “Dropout Crisis.” We have a “Burnout Crisis” in kids, teens, and under 30 adults today.

      I include myself among countless others. We shame non-grads (Whether High school or College) at times even worse than criminals, and I’m sorry if that’s sounds like an exaggeration, but that’s what it FEELS like, and if it didn’t I wouldn’t say it. Period.

      I truly hope your daughter never feels that way, Kelly, I wish the pain I felt at stopping school for myself at 10th Grade on no one, and I hope Judy’s boys never face that fate, or if they do, they won’t be alone.

      Burnout is no longer limited to mid-agers. Until educators and parents of all walks of life can accept and admit that, we can’t move forward as a nation, and we need to stop shaming people who didn’t meet certain educational milestones “On Time.” I’m still working through that myself.

      We also need to open the conversation to what having a college degree, or even a high school degree REALLY means?

      AS much as many people over 30 tell me “College isn’t everything”, when that’s aLL you hear and see in the world, what do you expect people to think?

      If the people who tell me this and mean it can’t name someone, whether historical or personal, that lives in THIS century that got somewhere without a college degree, you’re just patting me on the head like I’m freaking out over nothing.

      That may not be the intent, but that’s the impression I get.